Changing into different outfits does it guarantee successful marriage
If I tell you I regret changing up to 14 times outfits in days on my marriage day will you believe me? Yes, because those clothes are still laying down in the same suitcase they were packed in during the marriage ceremony. I just wasted my father, my own money and husbands money for just show off. My dear sisters, any other thing that happens after the blessing of the marriage is a cultural initiative and not religiously stated in the Holy Quran.
Our changing of outfits has got nothing absolutely nothing to do with what Prophet Mohammed SWT stated in the Holy book in connection to marriage. Don’t let anyone misled you. Most of us know this very well because we have been to Arabic schools and so know the teachings of Islam but we simply refuse to let it sink in. So many times, we Ignorantly confuse culture and religion.
At other times, we tend to think both are the same but they are so not the same. Culture is a way of life whiles religion is the belief in and worship of superhuman controlling power.
Clearly form this google explanation you can tell they are two different things altogether. Not the same or equal to each other.
The Holy Quran never stated that in any Sura, it is a must or part of the ceremony that the bride should change her clothes just to come and dance to the crowd. Did you know it’s even a great sin onto the bride when women who attend the marriage have to sit in the circle forms and be getting up to dance in groups to the worldly music? The most blessed and accepted marriage according to Islam, is the one, women sit together to listen to Hutoba “preaching”.
During this time, a lot is preached and taught to both the married and unmarried ones by a Mallama or Mallam. Now this is what I call blessed marriage not the one, women both young and old have to dance in a shameful and at time immoral manner to the eyes of the public. The most memorable and important part during marriage ceremonies is when the bride o called to come out and sit beside my husband for the Imam to tie the knot, bless and pray for the couple.
It’s just dignified Changing into whatever outfits and coming out just to showcase to the guest is not only a daunting task but a total waste of time and so backward thinking. I mean why will I waste an amount of money on different outfits on just a one day’s ceremony? Meanwhile, on the contrary, deep down in my heart I know after marriage, my husband and I have got loads of bills to settle and other matters. Dear, don’t worry yourself so much just to create an impression to the people you think matter, yet they don’t even matter.
Ideally, it’s your own money or your husbands’ money but believe it is not necessary. If you still are bent on creating that impression, you can at least do it in moderation. Not over the top. Changing into different clothes types, colours and styles with matching fan, clutch, Gele and Jewelry just to show to guests is not only stressful but dramatic.
My dear lady, I understand it’s your Big day and so making that fashion statement means a lot to you. Yes, you want people to know dressed to kill. Or you are marrying a rich man? Nobody has been awarded best dressed “amariya” before. All we sit and do to brides as guests is run commentary, calculate and judge her outfits, shoes and make up and that’s all there is about it.
Nothing more Take a second and read this particular sentence slowly. The amount of money used for each outfit with the matching shoes and clutches, “Gele” and Jewelry is just total waste of money. Waste of someone’s hard earned money. Either your own money, parent or husband’s money that can be saved for the future.
Believe it or not, there are trying times in marriages. If not at the beginning, maybe along the way or the end. Am not wishing bad for anyone’s marriage. But some things are just unrealistic. After marriage, my husband and I had our own share of what is called “married life trying times” but Alhamdullilah we were able to overcome it.
Imagine if we were owing people or the number of outfits I wore, on credit, it means it would have been a double dose of trying times. I will have to clear on my outfits debts. Just imagine. Research shows that, “ashiega fudu fudu” is not our culture we stole it from the Nigerians. It’s their way of life. It’s a part of their tradition.
Now what you and I need to read have about very well is, what do our kind of tribes do during marriage ceremony after it’s been blessed by the Imam so that in place of this nonsense “ashiega fudu fudu” we rather focus on showcasing our rich culture to the world. Let us find our own tune and forget this stolen one. About 60% of the time, most of these clothes are hired or bought on credit.
Yes, it’s the plain truth. I Will say it without mincing words. We have heard stories where newly married amariyas are publicly shamed and ridiculed because they couldn’t return the outfits or go to pay their debts.